What next?

Do you ever become so confused and invested in your thoughts that you just wish there was a pause button?

A button you could press to make everything stop for a moment, a day, a month or even a year just so you had time to collect your emotions and figure out what direction exactly you are heading in?

Do you ever wish you could just fast forward to the future so you can see how your life is going to turn out? So you know if all your hard work right now is going to pay off, or if your choices right now are just a bunch of mistakes?

Do you ever get so lost in life that all your dreams and ambitions become a blur and you have generally no idea if anything you are doing right now is what you want? You question every move and every decision you have ever made because you have hit a wall and you just don’t know…

This sense of unknowing, confusion, lack of direction can really throw people off. They can make you really question and lose touch of who you are as a person. They can make you forget how far it is you have really come and make you challenge your worth and your capabilities.

Hitting this wall can become a really damaging period of your life if you aren’t quick enough to recover and continue on with your journey.
During this time you will make mistakes, you will fall over countless amounts of times and do things that you usually wouldn’t do. Your judgement will be extremely clouded.

But the worst part of all, you probably won’t even care.

The wall will consume all of your emotional energy and leave you with an empty soul. And at the end of the day, once you are trapped in this phase, the only way up is through you.
You are the driver of your own life; you are responsible for picking yourself back up and finding your two feet again.
When this feeling bites away at you day after day after day, you will become fed up with the negativity and find it within yourself to go back to the things that you love and become in touch with your heart and your soul again.

Don’t lose sight of yourself because of a few wrong turns and mistakes in life, instead use these as lessons and motivation to bring you back to speed and continue creating a life and a soul that you can be proud of. So what are you going to do next?

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Cutting Ties

Every day in each of our lives, we learn and grow.
Every day we change in some way, whether that be physically, mentally or spiritually.
As we grow, our wants and needs adapt and we are then forced into situations whereby we must confront the idea of ‘change’.

 

The people we surround ourselves with at this point in time wont always be around forever. There comes a point in our lives where we wake up and realise that some of these people we call our friends, partners and even sometimes family, aren’t always whats best for us in the long run.
At one point in time, we enjoyed this relationship. But when we realise we are no longer growing from this connection it becomes time to cut it loose.
This then becomes the hard part.

 

The idea of conflict, the idea of letting somebody down, the idea of confronting your issues…

when you are around something or someone negative for so long it becomes more so a habit or forced interaction rather than a positive aspect of your life. What I have learned is, if something is not bringing you joy and happiness, not pushing you to be the best you can be and not inspiring you to do better, then why are you wasting your time?
Whether this means quitting that draining job, cutting off that one sided friendship or blocking yourself out from that negative drama, it is a step you need to take.

 

Once you realise this and acknowledge where this feeling inside your body is coming from, gaining the courage to confront it becomes that little bit easier. Your mindset becomes stronger and you develop the picture in your head of how things SHOULD and WILL be. Once you uncover this bit of strength and begin to face your problem, you become the one with the power.
Although, you always had this power, you were just too nice to ever use it.

This power will drive you, it will motivate you and it will take you to where you need to be. Just maintain that strength to follow it through and trust your own abilities.

 

Life is too short to spend any moment unhappy, especially when you have control over it. In 10 years time are you going to look back and regret anything you are doing right now? Will you wish you had done something different? Would you give yourself any advice?

 

You have goals, you have dreams and you have ambition. Set yourself free from anything or anyone that holds you back from this. Follow your heart and aim for the stars. Negativity is something that will only ever bring you down, but you, you belong in the sky.
I promise you that breaking free from any bad energy you experience in your life, will be the greatest feeling you could ever give to yourself.
The scissors are in your hands.

Highs and Lows

It takes strength not to abandon yourself.
There are times when you feel so alone, so hurt, so angry, so disappointed or so frustrated that you just want to get up and run away forever.
You put yourself down to feel so low, like you’ll never pick back up…To the point where it seems as though there is no return.

In those times you’ll think about other people and how they deal with things. You’ll think about all the things you should have done or should have said, all the steps you should have taken, all the signs you should have seen.
And you’ll over analyse everything, as usual. You’ll begin to hate yourself for all those things you could have and ‘should have’ done.

Its as if you find pleasure in overthinking things and stressing out, you just cant seem to stop.
But at the end of the day, the clocks not turning back, so what’s left for you to do?

You’re going to find that strength and find that courage to back yourself up.
Embrace those decisions and own what you do.
Analyse the situation, but don’t lose sleep over it.
These wrong turns in life define who you become, they help you learn, they help you grow.
They make you the person you’re destined to be.
It’s your journey and its okay to get lost along the way, to not know which direction is right.
Just please do not lose sight of your purpose.
Let that drive you,
Let that motivate you,
Let that define you.

Don’t let your feelings of insecurity and confusion allow you to lose who you have become.
Don’t allow it to have the power to make you doubt yourself and all you have achieved.
Do not allow it to be the end of you.

Find the little things in life that remind you that its all going to be okay.
Read a book,
Go on an adventure,
See your friends,
Listen to music,
Anything you can do to just feel at ease even for five minutes.
Because those five minutes can have the power to change all. They can remind you how strong you are and how close you are to your goal. They can give you that extra push to get you over the finish line, to make you a happier version of yourself.
So during the times where life gets tough, go out of your way to find those things. A few moments of optimism in your life can save a lifetime of regrets.
Because when things get hard we sometimes take the ‘easier’ option and just quit, but not you, you can accomplish all, and success is all yours.

Let the low times in your life follow through higher than you’ve been before.
This is your life, it’s time to stop being so hard on yourself.

The true idea of ‘fate’

We all tend to depend a lot of our decisions and life choices around the idea of ‘fate.’

What we do not realise is that fate is no true measure of growth.

Fate is not a person. It does not have hands that can magically move things and influence them to happen. It does not have ears to listen to your every wish and it does not have a mouth to tell you where to go.

Fate is simply an idea, not an action.

We put things down to fate because we do not have enough trust in ourselves to follow through with what our hearts really want.
It’s like when you flip a coin, but your decision becomes clear as soon as that coin goes up in the air.
We already know what we really want; we are all just waiting for it to happen.
We allow our fears to control us instead of taking risks and putting ourselves out there.
Too many of us have faced rejection and are now too afraid to put our hearts back out there in fear of being hurt.

But tell me something, if we do not take control of our own lives how can we ever expect to be happy?
How can we expect to end up with everything we ever wanted?
How can we really achieve our full potential?

We cannot just sit back and expect everything to fall into place for us.
When we wait around for something to happen, we allow other things to come into the mix.
If you wait around for that boy, some other girl will come along and steal his heart.
If you’re waiting around for your dream job, some other person is currently being interviewed.
If you wait around for that perfect moment, a million others are currently passing by.

Why allow the idea of fate to control your idea of perfection?

Why not become your own idea of fate?
Take ownership of your life and your desires.
Figure out what you want and go for it.
Take risks, open up and be free to the idea of possibly being hurt.
You were born with the capacity to hurt as well as the capacity to heal and overcome pain. So what are you so afraid of?
Remember pain is growth.

Think of the plus side, you may just get everything you’ve ever wanted as a consequence of opening your heart.

Take a risk. Take a leap. Take a chance.
You are fate; make it happen.

 

The winner

You turned your life into a game.
You gambled the best thing you ever had only to be left with nothing.
You didn’t win.
You didn’t come out on top.
And as for her, she didn’t win first prize either.
She pulled herself into a trap.
I guess in the end she got what she deserved…
She knew it all along, how twisted and manipulative you were.
I guess that’s where the game became even between us, I knew these things all along also, yet continued to live in this dark hole.

She laughs; she calls herself lucky, she claims to be ‘in love’.
She is none of those things.
Her laugh, it is fake.
Her luck, is misfortune in disguise.
She can only ever be in love with the idea of what ‘could be’.
Because I tell you, you can not change the devil.
You can not warm a heart that is ever so frozen.
You can not change a person forever.
Who they are is who they are, and they will do whatever it takes and say whatever it takes to get what they want.

She is blinded by the lies, the stories, the hope of ‘someday’. She can not see the truth, no matter how exposed to it she is.
Standing back from those shoes where I once stood, I see it all. Every word, every lie, every moment.
462 days of the same life crushing routine.
And only now I see it. Only once I allowed it to destroy me.

So as she smiles and sees herself as ‘above me’ because she ‘won’ the guy,
I laugh. As in the end, who is the true winner?
It’s the girl who got to escape, find her two feet again, rebuild her identity, change her life for the better, restore her health and get back in touch with her soul. Its me.

She may have the guy, but I have much more. I have my life back, my soul and my real happiness.

So I say thank you. Thank you for taking away the toxin in my life and allowing me to find my paradise. Thank you for showing me exactly what I don’t want or need in life, for allowing me to find my purpose.
Although after what you’ve done you do deserve this hurt and pain, you both deserve each other. But I hope you realise that what you have isn’t ‘forever’. A man like that is incapable of loving you the way you think he does.
So I tell you, don’t ever let another girl be the reason to break free. Listen to your inner voice, trust your instincts and become a winner. Never settle for less than you deserve.

I’m not saying its easy, I’m not saying its smooth.
I’m saying it’s worth it,
To walk away from something that serves you less than you are worthy of.
Know who you are, don’t let somebody define that for you, and live the life you dreamed of with people who genuinely respect and appreciate you.

Life is too short to waste on games and horrible people.

Every relationship has its ups and downs, but when you feel yourself facing more negatives than positives, maybe you need to reconsider your definition of happiness.

Step back from the situation and think of the transformation you can make. It’s going to be a long journey, but one in which you can look back and be proud of. Don’t ever allow your broken heart to be the end of you, put it back together and make it your new beginning. I believe in you.

The road less travelled

In life, we all have goals. We all have ambitions and visions as to what we want to do with ourselves. Each day we all work to achieve this to end up in our idea of ‘paradise’.

I too have goals, I know what I want in life and I know how I am going to achieve it. I understand that there are inevitable bumps in the road that I will come across and I understand that sometimes I may feel down, I may feel defeated; I may feel so uncontrollably lost.

But then I remind myself of a few things…

 

You don’t always have to like everything all the time.
You don’t always have to have a smile on your face.
You don’t always have to have your shit together.
You don’t always have to seem so emotionally strong.

It is completely okay, not to be okay sometimes.
Take a step back. Look at yourself in the mirror.
Look deeper than just the reflection staring back at you.
Look into your soul.
Who are you? What do you want in life?
The world is yours, so what difference do you want to make?
What are you going to let define you?
These are the real questions.

 

The answers cannot be found in a book, no matter how hard you study.
These answers cannot be told by asking somebody else, no matter how close you may be.
These answers lie solely in you and the experiences you open yourself up to.

It’s amazing how different the world may seem once you know these answers like the back of your hand.

Your eyes become clearer, your smile becomes wider, your mind becomes purer and your heart becomes deeper.
You have the ability to change the world, one day at a time. Everything you do, matters.

 

Although sometimes, its not about changing the world.
Sometimes it becomes more about changing somebodies world.
Making someone feel less alone. Bringing someone a connection that they have never felt before. Touching their life in a way they never imagined. Letting them know that someone out there in this big world understands them and can relate to them.
Sometimes that comfort is all somebody needs to keep them going.

You have no idea how much just a few words can change somebodies life forever.

The idea of ‘karma’ states that what goes around, comes around.
In order for you to have self-realisation, you must have found inspiration somewhere, so share that. Light up somebodies darkest hours, by sharing your sky full of stars.

All some people need is to be reassured that they DO matter. They ARE loved. And they ARE special.

Everybody has something to battle in life; we all have our issues and rocky roads.
We are all warriors in our own worlds and we are all tougher than anything that comes our way.
Sometimes when we hit the ground of our lowest low, and we all do from time to time, we just need to be reminded of our beautiful qualities and strength in life.

 

So if you’re watering your own garden, don’t be afraid to share the watering can. You never know if the person next to you is suffering a drought. And you never know how far that little bit of water can get a person.
Don’t underestimate the power of kindness. You have the ability to change someone’s life, and that is a reward greater than no other.
Take the road less travelled and spread positive energy throughout. Believe in yourself and the ability of others, you cannot dream without belief, and at the end of the day who are you without a dream?

The Strongest Souls

It’s upsetting to realise that the strongest people we know are quite often the ones who have been through the most heartache and pain in their lives. It’s also even more upsetting to realise how young these people often are considering how much they have been through.
Their world could be crumbling down yet they still manage to live each day with a smile and stand there for the ones who need them the most.
They could have a million and one things on their mind, yet when you call for them they’re at your side in a heartbeat.
They seem so happy, yet behind that smile is a great deal of hurting that we know nothing about.

These are the people who deserve nothing but good fortune and happiness yet somehow encounter so many rocks and bumps on the way.
You often look at these people and admire them for how far they have come, how well they have managed and how truly great they are. You think to yourself ‘How do they do it?’ but the truth it, strength grows in those moments where you think about giving up. Where you think this is it and begin to throw in the towel. In those few moments where you think you cant go on, but you keep going anyway.

What these amazing people need to remember is that they are powerful. Their strong heart and resilient mind will get them through everything. They just have to believe.
God gives their hardest battles to those who can handle it. And it may seem unfair, but honey you have the love and support of so many people around you to help you through whatever comes your way. But the most important thing you need, is the love and support from yourself. Don’t let yourself stay down after you’ve been knocked, use your strength to get back up and fight back harder than ever because life is tough, but darling so are you. You are not what has happened to you, you are what you have chosen to become because of it.

It is okay not to be okay.
It is okay to need a push sometimes.
It is okay to cry.
And it is okay to hurt.
But it is not okay to do it alone.
It is okay for you to feel the way you feel, you do not need to justify this in any way.
All you need to do is accept it, deal with it and grow from it. Keep a positive mindset; keep that smile on your face. Keep being you.
Things may be rough, but storms don’t last forever. You’ll arrive at your paradise soon enough. Everything will fall into place. You will find love, you will be happy and healthy, you will be content with your memories and you’ll be surrounded by people who love and care for you dearly.
You are not alone on these cold days, you’ll always have a shoulder to lean on and somebody to help hold your umbrella in the rain when your arms get sore.
You will also always have somebody to share the sunshine with when the clouds have all disappeared. You are never alone, remember that.

In life it is important to look back and see how far you’ve come. You should always be proud of yourself.
Your strength inspires those around you and it should inspire you throughout your journey.
Trust me, you are greater than you think.
You just need to ‘keep on-keeping on’